


Impulse Theft

by Signe_chan



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: AU, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-29
Updated: 2015-05-29
Packaged: 2018-04-01 19:44:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4032349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Signe_chan/pseuds/Signe_chan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Phil disturbs a burglar in his fiance's bedroom. </p><p>Written for the tumblr post : </p><p>‘You’re stealing all the valuables in my betrothed’s house and I just walked in and caught you in the act but honestly he’s an ass and I hate that I’m marrying him just because our families arranged it so hey… do you think you could steal me too’ AU</p>
            </blockquote>





	Impulse Theft

**Author's Note:**

> Just fyi, this fic is set just after world war 2. Because apparently that's just how I roll this week. 
> 
> Thank you to featheredschish for beta reading <3

Phil Coulson walked into the bedroom with “Oh Phillip, won’t you be a dear and fetch my diamond” still ringing in his ears. He paused, then stepped forward and gently shut the door behind himself. 

“Okay, this looks bad,” the thief said, releasing the handful of costume jewelry he was in the process of stealing from Audrey’s dressing table. They clattered noisily down to the table top and Phil winced but there wasn’t really much chance that anyone in the drawing room would hear, not with the party still as lively as it was. 

“It does look bad,” Phil agreed. “Care to explain yourself?” 

“I’m...well, you can see what I’m doing,” the man said, flushing. “Can I just go? I mean, I’ll leave everything and I’ll never steal again, I swear. Just…” 

“It’s not good form to swear to something if you don’t intend to keep it,” Phil said, walking over to the dresser. The thief was well built. A little taller than him. It would probably be a fair fight if they chose to engage but Phil would take his chance. It would work out some frustration at least. He sorely needed to work out some frustration. 

“Yeah, you’re right,” the thief said, lowering his head. “I’m sorry. Nobody’s ever just walked in on me like this before. I mean, I’ve been discovered but the normal reaction is to scream or something, not to ask questions.” 

“I’m glad to know I’ve defied your expectations,” Phil said with a smile. He picked up one of the pieces of costume jewellery. A gaudy faux-pearl thing. “Would you like to tell me why, exactly, you’re stealing my fiance’s dress jewellery?” 

“Need the money,” the thief said. He shifted on the spot like a little boy who’d been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. “I won’t bore you with my sorry past but let’s say I have a certain knowledge of breaking and entering. When I came back from the war I was going to go straight, I swear to you I was, but nobody wanted me for a honest job and I have a brother who, if I don’t do this, will do something even more stupid to get money.” 

“There’s something more stupid than this?” 

“He’s prone to gambling and doesn’t know when he’s lost. Anything to keep him out of debt with the men who run the gambling halls.” 

“Yes, I see,” Phil said. And he did. He wasn’t insensitive, and the thief looked so damn sincere. Phil knew a lot of guys who’d come home to a hero’s welcome that had lasted exactly long enough for the war to really set into their bones and then nobody wanted to know. It wasn’t as though he’d escaped unscathed himself, though his command position had afforded him a little safety at least. 

He turned the necklace over again. A bauble. Audrey had far too many of them. She had far too much of everything. Wasn’t that part of the reason he was here. 

“Here,” he said, holding it out. “Just take the damn thing. In fact, take it all.” 

“You’re helping me steal from your fiance?” the thief asked, reaching out to touch the necklace. Phil hooked the thing over his fingers and grabbed another. 

“Yes. Yes I am.” 

“Do I get to ask why or is that just for you?” 

Phil reached over and pulled open a hidden drawer. She kept most of her actual jewels in there and the thief’s jaw nearly hit the floor when he saw it. 

“I’m helping you because I don’t like my fiance very much, if I’m being perfectly honest and I may as well be.” 

“You don’t like her?” 

“No,” Phil said, passing over handfuls of jewels. “Or, rather, I don’t want to marry her. I suppose she’s fine. She was a good friend when I was young, but I have as much desire to marry her as I do to go back to the damn front. Actually, probably less.” 

“Then why are you?” 

Phil paused for a second, looking down at the jewels in his hands. It was a good question and there were a lot of answers he could give here but the truth was the first thing that came to mind. After all, when this conversation was over this man would be running as far and fast as he could anyway so might as well tell the truth. 

“Well, the official story is that we corresponded while I was in the army and fell in love. Which is of course rubbish. Nobody in the arms falls in love with anything but the idea of a quiet life and I never wanted that. My parents have let it circulate that we have money troubles which they’ll solve through this marriage, which is true but isn’t the reason for the marriage. The truth is that during the war I was...shall we say less than discrete? I took lovers, male lovers. There didn’t seem to be any reason to hide it when we might die any day. Then we dropped the bomb and the entire thing was suddenly over and now I have to face the consequences.” 

“Hey,” the thief said, reaching out to brush Phil’s hand. It was the most tender touch he’d had in a long time. “I’m sorry.” 

“Not your doing,” Phil said, pulling his hand back. Better not to let the gentle touch linger. It wasn’t like he intended to get used to it. “Audrey knows but wants me anyway so I suppose I should be grateful. At least I’m not shaming my family.” 

“Not the same though, is it,” the thief said. “I...let’s just say you’re not the only one who had indiscretions at war. Nobody looks too closely when you’re in a trench and you might die any day. I never regret that it’s over but sometimes…” 

“Sometimes the bed is too soft,” Phil finished. “Sometimes every piece of food tastes like ash on my tongue. Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever feel another body beside me that I actually want there again.” 

He hadn’t meant to say that. Hadn’t meant to reveal things and when he did he found he coldn’t look at the thief any more. It was meant to be simple and uncomplicated. You came back from the war then got on with the business of living your normal life. Nothing was the same, though. He wasn’t the man who’d left, the one who would have gladly done what he needed to do and marry his childhood friend for money. He was someone else now. 

The thief stepped in closer, and Phil opened his mouth to say something, anything, to end this encounter but then gentle fingers were brushing his jaw and it was so easy to turn his head and let the young man kiss him. So easy to let his hand come up and rest on the other man’s back, to hold him close. So easy and so good. 

That was when he realised he couldn’t marry Audrey. He just couldn’t. It was too much.

“Hey,” the thief said, drawing back. “I’m sorry. I just…” 

“No, that was just what I needed. Thank you.” 

“I didn’t come in here intended to steal kisses.” 

“And it wasn’t stolen. It was a gift. I wish there was time for me to give you more.” 

“So do I,” the thief said, softly. “I’m Clint, by the way. I feel like you should at least know my name.” 

“Phil.” 

They stood there for a second, pressed into each other’s space. Phil couldn’t stop thinking. He didn’t know what he was going to do, just what he couldn’t do. He couldn’t stay here. Couldn’t be the man his family wanted but where did that leave him? 

He pulled back slowly. Walked to the closet. Inside was the box with the diamond. Not a giant stone but big enough to be impressive. Big enough to start a new life, maybe. He took it out of the case very carefully then handed it over to Clint. Clint watched him, puzzled. 

“Go and, I don’t know, buy a business of your own or something. Go straight. It should be enough.” 

“I...that’s too much. I mean, I know I came in here to steal but not something like this.” 

“Her family can afford it. Besides, all I’ve heard since I came back from the war is how this necklace was bought for her by her father. What a strong and virile man he was. How I should try and be more like him. I want to strangle them all with it so really you’re be doing me a favour by removing temptation.” 

“It’s too much.” 

“It isn’t. I know it’s ridiculous, all you’ve done is break into my house, but thank you. I needed what you’ve brought me.” 

“You’re welcome,” Clint said, finally tucking the necklace into his jacket. “What are you going to do now? I mean...what are you going to tell them?” 

“I don’t know,” Phil said. “Hell, maybe I’ll just tell them the truth. It’ll be terrible but at least it’ll be out then. At least I know now I’m never going to be able to marry Audrey.” 

“I didn’t know my kissing was that good.” 

“Not just that,” Phil said, smiling up at Clint. “Marrying her would be a coward’s way out. I’m not a coward. This isn’t a life I can live peacefully anymore, and I’m not even sure I want to try for peace. I don’t know what I do want but…” 

“If that’s the case there is one more thing I’d like to steal,” Clint said, reaching down and taking Phil’s hand. 

“What?” 

“You,” Clint said, grinning. “Come with me. We can just climb out the window and go. You don’t have to stay here.” 

“I have responsibilities…” 

“You’re going to leave them anyway,” Clint pointed out, squeezing his hand. “This...this entire thing is insane but in the time we’ve been talking you’ve treat me more like an actual person than anyone else has in a long, long time. You’re compassionate and strong and I want to get to know you more, Phil. So come with me.” 

And Phil just couldn’t think of a single reason to say no. Well, he could think of many. His parents, Audrey, her family. The world was changing, though. He knew people like them, people with money. They intended to close their doors to the world and pretend it didn’t touch them. He didn’t want to live like that. He wanted to help people and make a difference and wake up with Clint by his side, if at all possible. 

He’d once met Captain America on the front lines. He’d been smitten instantly but it hadn’t just been that the man was built like a wet dream. It was the nobility he held himself with. His determination to do good, to win in the face of anything. Phil wanted that for himself. Wanted to be that person. 

He stood up and leant in to kiss Clint again, making it long and deep. When he stepped back Clint was blinking at him like he’d never been kissed like that before. 

This was the most ridiculous, most impulsive thing he’d done since setting foot back in American soil and he’d never felt so alive. 

“Alright, you’ve stolen me. Now, what next?” 

“Well,” Clint said, his face breaking into a grin. “Now you follow me. And from there, well, we’ll work it out together.”


End file.
